RACE 3 REPORT AND RESULT - SHANGHAI

SQUEAK TAKES MAIDEN WIN AS WORLD CHAMP RUES WOT WENT WONG!

Race 3 - Shanghai - Pole = r0ckeye - HORMONE REPLACEMENT THERAPY 1:35.987

The first dry qualifying of the season saw r0ckeye claim his first pole of the season with a time that was 3 seconds up on last seasons pole, laying down his gauntlet for the rest of the field 0.769 seconds ahead of bannbino. Adman took the 3rd spot a further 0.5 seconds back in front of another excellent quail for Villa John in 4th. Sheepie UK took a solid 5th, 0.2 seconds ahead of best of the rookies, EagleJay. 7th slot was taken by another rookie, Satak0, pipping last seasons 3rd place man, Tempy by 0.2 seconds. Hypno’s usually reliable setups let him down and he only managed 9th, 0.6 further seconds back. Cheeseman rounded out the top ten almost 3 seconds back and major technical problems, including a gearbox change, saw Squeak at the back of the grid in 11th, 17 seconds off the pace as, unfortunately, BSheepie suffered technical problems in the quali session and was unable to set a time or make the race as his seat caught fire due to a particularly potent level 5 China Town number 34 Chicken Schezuan Style for lunch earlier.

An unusually long pause by Race Director Charlie Whiting turning the lights out left many people staring instead of looking, leaving the full revvers with overheating engines and less power for the get away! This didn’t hold things up at the front though as the top 4 cars got away on the dash down to turn 1.

The 260 degree first corner at the Shanghai International Circuit is probably one of the most difficult to get right, and it’s not made any easier when you’ve got 10 eager dodgems bearing down on your shitbox. Unfortunately for r0ckeye, this proved too much as the fear of getting his exhaust kicked in meant he broke late and ran wide on cold tyres, out onto the marbles. In the words of the god like Martin Brundle, "if you find yourself out there, you’d better start getting ready for some hospital food". bannbino saw the opportunity to lead the race and held the inside line with Adman close behind. R0ckeye’s eagerness to recover the position caused him to overdo the throttle pedal and spin on his way out of turn 2 and into turn 3. Squeak had already made up 7 places to 4th so when r0ckeye span, the podium would be settled, but not necessarily who would be on what step!

Meanwhile, towards the back of the grid, the carnage that unfolded from r0ckeye’s spin was in plain sight for Satak0 who took the most of the opportunity to gain a couple of places from 9th. By now 7 cars were in close order at the front when an error into turn 6 by bannbino allowed Adman up alongside, unbeknownst to bannbino, but knownst to Adman. There was some wheel to wheel, which bannbino came out of on top. Tempy was by now up into 4th place and was looking on for some solid championship points. However, any hairpin on lap 1 of any Grand Prix is always interesting and several cars ran wide on the exit. This closed the gap between Tempy and rookie Cheeseman in 5th and when they got to the final corner of the lap, Cheeseman’s over enthusiastic dash up the inside gave Tempy something to think about as he got punted off the black stuff and lost his front wing.

By lap 3 Cheeseman was coming under pressure from another rookie in the form of EagleJay, but his aggressive defending style managed to hold him off. bannbino was starting to edge out at the front with a 5 second lead over Adman who was busy defending from Squeak, but a problem with traction control saw him spin off onto the grass on the inside of turn 12/13, which wiped the slate clean! There was some more wheel to wheel with a more rapidly accelerating Adman before bannbino moved off the racing line, allowing the faster Squeak to attack Adman going into the hairpin at turn 14. Bannbino braked early, knowing he’d have to relent for now so he could fight back later on in the GP, only to see Adman and Squeak outbrake themselves into the hairpin and run wide! bannbino hit the apex and retook the lead of the race and Squeak had done enough to take 2nd place!

bannbino had restored 2.5 seconds of his lead by the time the top 3 drivers all pitted at the end of lap 4. Excellent work by all the pitcrews saw no order change at this stage but damage sustained earlier in the race by Cheeseman lead to his retirement from the race, only a 3rd of the way through. Heartbreak for the Cheese as he felt he had a strategy to maybe get his first podium. SheepieUK’s diligent use of his soft tyres during qualifying allowed him to run the extra lap in the race which promoted the current World Champion into the lead of the race, and the same strategy for Hypno saw him take 2nd. Could the tactic pay off? With clear air in front, could they set a faster in-lap to hold the positions?

No, is the answer to both those questions, as Hypno’s tyres were down to the canvas, he couldn’t hold onto the camber change between turns 2 and 3 on lap 5, and span, right in front of bannbino, squeak and Adman, dropping him out of contention. Sheepie didn’t manage to improve on his 8 second lead which meant he came out of his stop in 5th behind r0ckeye, who had managed to get past on the undercut. Satak0 exited the pit lane after his stop just in front of a recovering Tempy who saw an opportunity up the inside of turn 4 and a slight nudge left Satak0 spinning!

Turn 12/13 came back to haunt bannbino again on lap 7 as he ran wide, caught his soft underbelly on the kerb and span 180 degrees so he could watch Squeak and Adman come through. Luckily there was enough of a gap to allow a spin to get going again without taking a foot off the podium. In car communications went quiet around this point, giving the impression that there was a lot of concentration going on, none more so than at the front, where Squeak looked to consolidate his lead. Could he possibly win the race from the back of the grid??

By lap 10 bannbino had closed the gap to Adman and, after a slight love-kiss to let him know he was there, the pressure got the better of Adman, and, with fading tyres, he span on the exit of turn 9 allowing bannbino through to 2nd. That would settle the podium for the Grand Prix with Squeak taking a well deserved maiden career win. World champion Sheepie UK was unable to capitalise on Adman’s 10 second penalty for earlier indiscretions and fisinshed 4th ahead of Hypno in 5th. Tempy recovered to 6th after having to stop again for a new wing. A lost front wing in the last few laps saw polesitter r0ckeye drop down to 7th and Villa John’s excellent qualifying was again ruined by “too many f-ing love taps! Just a reminder to the field that this was the Chinese Grand Prix, not the Thai Grand Prix as they must have thought I was a Bangkok-chickboy the amount of times I got rammed up the dirtbox!” He finished 9th, behind Satak0 who made up a place from the grid, and ahead of EagleJay.


Here's how the finished looked:




Now the circus leaves the Orient and heads west for the Occident. To Turkey next, then Spain, and Monaco. Squeak with his trophy tucked under arm, looks forward to building on his first win, rueing his poor choice of tyres in Malaysia, while bannbino looks to build on his strong start and world champion Sheepie UK wonders wot-went-wong in the East.

As the Pet Shop Boys once sang, Go West...

See you next time.

James Allen

Pmsl

i hope this was a better line on the pit lane exit, Bernie...?

bannbino wrote:
i hope this was a better line on the pit lane exit, Bernie...?

Yep that's how your supposed to do it